Dec 15, 2009
phoenix
well of course as soon as i mention things working out with our fedex runs. they send us to phoenix. it started out ok. we received this load as usual, a target load to phoenix.
only ours is suppose to be t-called and we drop the trailer in fresno. this time it was not t-called, so here we are in phoenix. the run isnt bad its 1400 miles. and no snow or ice to worry about. the problem is they gave us 3 days to go 1400 miles. that makes this a solo drivers load. solo driver can only drive about 600 miles a day. we're here early, just sitting. will thinks they will hurry and give us a return load to get us back to I5 corridor. and maybe they will, i doubt it. anyway it wont make up for the miles lost this week sitting waiting to deliver this.
as a team we should be driving 5000-6000 miles a week, so far this week we have 1400 miles and the week is already half over.
so far this isnt working out the way i hoped. why am i out here away from my home, my family, my kids, my grand kids, my friends if im not making big bucks. i miss cooking dinner every night, cleaning the house, taking care of the yard, going to church, walking the dog, craft projects, our son's senior year of high school, other family issues going on. belly dancing, eating what agrees with me, i miss all that stuff. i dont feel like i am being a good mother, grandmother, daughter or sister. i feel so much like my place is at home but i cant be home because the bill collectors think my place is at work. i wish i had more options i wish i could get a normal job and be home to help with some of this stuff. im sure i wont be able to solve everything but just being home, being there for a shoulder to rcy on , being there to hear good news rather than getting the good news~or bad news weeks later because everyone thought i already heard. so far the trade off doesnt seem fair.
but we will see what tomorrow brings.
love and miss you all
